Friday, December 21, 2007

Silent treatment
had a massive arguement with my mum this morning, well not exactly as she did most of the yelling and started threatening me with wooden sticks. Seriously, what's up with adults these days? i just.. dont get it.
woke up at 10 this morning, and mummy insisted to give me a lift to school & collect my unsold second hand books. However, it was raining and i thought it might be a better idea if we went later, plus.. i was having brekkie neways. sooon after she heard that, it seemed as though she took it differently, rearranging what i said to a completely different connotation.
"you will never get things done! if u continue delaying.." & it goes on..
alright, if she wants to put it that way.
so i insisted if it was too much of a trouble.. i dont mind walking to school when the rain stops..
30minutes later, it was still pouring.. and my mum got so frustrated she got up from bed and started hitting me with the wooden stick! ohmygosh, i wasn't delaying for "christ" sake, everyone who lives in this freaking suburb would know how bad the rain was, how could i possibly walk all the way to schoool in such blustery weather.. However, in order to escape such tension that was going on, i walked straight outta the house without saying a word or an umbrella.. and ended up tearing in a corner + drenched//
for a moment there, i had the slightest thought of leaving the house to prevent such negative vibes that was in the family. though i've dissapointed her for delaying through times, but everything she said today was way beyond harsh.
"you, get out of the house, i don't want to have another look at you"
"wth? you want a diary for christmas? with such management skills, you wouldn't succeed even if i've given it to you"
"you are nothing but a useless piece of junk"
sounds unbelievable as it is, but i said nothing! to avoid conflict i'd rather keep out of trouble than causing it. but this time, she kept rubbing it in.. the fact that i was useless, and lazy, and a piece of junk!" i've got so much anger inside of me atm, and to let it all out by typing's not enough. & the only reason why i came back was the responsibility to look after my sister, no matter how bad the arguement went. I knew i had to put aside the issue and carry on with the responsibility. As much as i hate seeing my mum at the moment, she's still the person who looked after me for the past 15years, and i'd get over it eventually.

just not now.
holy moly im eating up my emotions

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